SANTA BABY

     On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me TWELVE East Side Story L Peeeeeees.  The photographs on these are so rad and the albums have the original tracks! Copyright laws are for the birds. DO NOT give me permission (have them shipped) to open gifts before Christmas because I can't NOT open them.

    

     I also received  the May 18, 1981 issue of Sports Illustrated with "Rookie Sensation" cover boy Fernando Valenzuela.  I have this weird Larry David "bathroom contamination" fear about magazines.  Luckily it came in a plastic sleeve- it's in really good condition for a nearly 30 year old mag. 

 

      That's it.  I'm accosting Fernando next time LA  is in town.  I will hug him,  stare directly into his upward gaze (yes I will request he simulate  his signature wind up) get his autograph and add it to my Wall O' Spiritual leaders/mentors/inspiring people.  Currently only my prized "Dee"  from What's Happening autograph (with personalized "To Mitsy 'ooooo, I'm telling Mama!' message) hangs there.   I wish I knew where my Mobb Deep autograph was.

      Annnnddd this is my Dad side to side with his subjective double Chico Che. There was a time when he was a little rounder,  crowned with more pepper than salt, wore aviator shades and thinned out the stache a little but never fully committed to the look as to don the overalls.

ZAZZLEAN

     Because I wasn't gonna have merch any other way, I'd like to thank people over at zazzle's ARTSPROJEKT for the invite to do this.  I'm draggin' on the making of actual products but I finally have SOMETHING up.  I get like 3 cents for every item I sell, so buy plenty and often.  That way I can use my entire royalty check on buying my own items. :)  If peddling my own images  don't get me paid you know I have some ideas for ironic tshirts in my back pocket.  But meanwhile here's what I got so far....

     Let me know if there is a certain product you'd like to see my junk on.  I want to steal your ideas. :) For instance if you'd like your face in place of one of my lady wrestlers or your dog inserted into one of my landscape paintings I can make that happen. 

REMIIIIIIX

      This will be my last baseball post UNLESS something miraculous happens like the McCourt divorce brings about new Dodgers owners that'll rape the free agency market. Cliff Lee or Carl Crawford, I want you. Besides hoopies start back up today.  I got basketball in my life now, lose it baseball. Go Rangers!

     And FERNANDO NATION , the Fernando Valenzuela 30 for 30 airs tonight!!!  Like, right now...so excited!  My brother had that poster.  He STILL has it up. :)

10/24

It's me Ma's birthday today.  She's the best.  Even the waitress at breakfast this morning said "How cute!" when my Mom stacked our dishes for her.  That's just the kind of class act Martha is. Sneaked in a lil tribute to her in a drawing that'll be printed up.

Feliz Cumpleaños Ama <3

OCTOBERPEST

   The devil finds work for idle hands to do.  Beleeb it.  ANNNNDDD since I don't have a place in the playoffs  this year,  it's time to root against and berate the crap teams in it to win it squeak through, by way of photoshop  bullying. Here goes... separated at birth playoff edition. 

 But I'm saying though.

      

      Posey weak chin and pear shaped = Stevie.  Carlos Ruiz, no neck,  gold chains and a penchant for ecstasy and stolen computer goods...easy! Hector Macho Camacho! Ruiz  doesn't have a "bad habit for drugs" (that we know of) nor did he pick up a burglary charge for stolen netbooks. (again, who knows? maybe).  That's all Hector but I just hate that guy, how he goes about his job,  all humble and quiet like, catching perfect games, getting clutch hits. Uuugghhhh.  

      Tim Lincecum's anorexic Rachel Zoe chipmunk jowls, mangled fangs and sexual ambiguity read godmother of punk, Patti Smith to me.  While Brian Wilson's brush-in-gel jet black beard, baby blues, eccentric accessorizing and entrance music "Pomp and Circumstance"  say Macho Man.  Viral Dodson should have warned Volquez to hide his change-up, hide his fastball because the Phillies rapin' everyone out here.  I always saw Matt Cain as Digger from Shirt Tales but he also makes a pretty Natalie Green. 

And is this just the same cholo or what ay?

 

Thank you.

RUBY ANNIVERSARY

      Last blog entry June 21st? How'd that happen? I'll tell you how. The Dodgers season sucked donkey, that's how. "Real talk" though, faceplace is a blog killer- I can easily share , upload, like and poke with little set up and wordage. You know I'm lazy. But I'll try to remember there are TV onlys that don't get the faceplace live feed and are not clued in to all the failbooking I do over there.

      I'll have my embroideries up in Galeria's 40th anniversary show starting this friday. It's a real honor.

     CeeLOS put me on to Summer Heights High recently. It's my best thing right now. I want to write something with an equally hilariously drawn prefix.

PAYBACK-TO-BACK

      I would like to thank all those that took time to write words of encouragement once the Lakers  had dropped games 2, 4 & 5 and thought the series was a Beantown wrap.  Hope that crow is to your liking.  Jerks. 

     Also, my brother is officially OUT from celebrating any Lakers championship parade today. Although I've asked to be unsubscribed from his mailing list he insists on his negatexts ruining my experience.  Here's how he copes with the pressure.

PAIN & GUILT:  1st quarter, not even 20 minutes into the game. 

ANGER & BARGAINING: Lower case not enough, he needed emphasis. I didn't even know he knew how to do all caps.

REFLECTION: Well, well, well...

ACCEPTANCE & HOPE:  Como si nada.

Alright now to find a link and take in some parade action. :P

CORAZÓN NOBLE

Amor de Padre, que todo lo demás es aire. 

        My Dad loves hotcakes, pork cracklins and the World Cup. That's his life right now.  He's my life, always.  I love you Puchie.

CHIQUITIBUM

        I've been training all week in order to be somewhat cognizant for tomorrow morning's fut, 7 AM?  Me lleva la _______.  Normal sleep hours are a challenge.  The best I've done is dozing off sometime between Jimmy Fallon's musical guest and the top stories on Sportscenter.   That lasted  all of 2 days.  I need to log Z's!  Let's hope the rage from witnessing the Bostonian Keltics antics (game 4) does not creep into my  nighttime head movies.  A slobbering high def Big baby in super shlomo does NOT a good look make.  Neither does this...

   

   So catch the Mundial vapors like the rest of us!  Get caught up on all the highs and lows beginning with this goofy good 86' Mexico World Cup footage set off with  innovative motion graphics amidst pre-Columbian interpretive dance.  This is all should have been covered in your brown studies courses. 

¡Vamos Mexico!   

TRIANGLE DEFENSE

If the Lakers hope to repeat I'm gonna need more defensive pantsing, aggressive stealing of high fives and intimidating selling of woof tickets.